I can’t call you “Bro”

Photo by Isabella Jusková on Unsplash

I need to get this out as I have an issue with saying the word “Bro”.

I don’t use the phrase “Bro” when addressing guys, especially to those whom I’m super close to. I just simply can’t bring myself to say it. I can say “I love you” to them (sparingly), but I just can’t call them bro. I simply can’t. I don’t even call my real brothers “bro”.

Somehow, “I love you” is not difficult to say because in my mind it’s how I should treat everyone. Showing love to another is like going above and beyond to help others. To support them, to outpour, to give. But “bro” comes along with so much more texture, meaning and mutual expectations in my mind.

To me, “Bro” is way too intimate. It’s a phrase that agrees to fully expose yourself to one another. To have no secrets. To share all unfiltered thoughts, not judge, to be there for the other with no strings attached. To take on long term responsibilities and become even more than family. I don’t think I can. It’s too big a step for me.

So for those who do call me “Bro”, don’t worry… I know you don’t overthink like me, but I just want you to know that I can’t call you “Bro” back.

Put everything you are into everything you do

Katelyn Ohashi is my current favourite Gymnast
Yoojung Lee is my current favourite Dancer
If I Ain’t Got You cover by Scary Pockets featuring Kenton Chen is my current favourite Cover
Remy Kouakou Kouame is my current favourite Lindy Hop Dancer

Oh my oh my… :) we LIVE for things like that. The fun… the FUN so evident that it shows in faces. The smiles, the joy, the laughter lol… all real, all 100% lit, all bringing us to our happy places synonymous with celebration and orgasms.

We all desire to feel this high, this adrenaline, this unspeakable place that we want to always be in. No judgement, no boundaries, no stress, no nothing that we don’t like and every every everything that we love. With the people that we like doing the things that we love!!!

How? How do we sustainability be in this state when the expectation and reality gap is so real. There is work to do, there are expectations to be met, there are responsibilities, there are challenges, there is REAL LIFE. WORK LIFE! BILLS!

At my age, I’ve managed to come across quite a lot of people from many nationalities, ethnicities and cultural backgrounds. My conclusion is that we more or less all want the same thing. We want to love what we do with the majority of our time.

  • Some think being rich is the way to get there, so they pour their lives into their career and do what it takes to amass wealth for themselves.
  • Some think doing what they love is a personal indulgence, hence only pursue their passion in their free time or delay their desires to when they retire.
  • Some think their professional self and their personal self needs to be two seperate personas. A constant work life balance. The need to constantly balance the demands of the office and the home, the pay master and the self.

BOY OH BOY. Do I have news for you!

Best summarised by a mantra within our office “Put everything you are into everything you do”. Let me break it down.

“Put everything you are…”

Know who you are. What you like, your passions, your desires, your effortless self. The most comfortable version of yourself loving to do the things you like to do. The song you sing in the shower, the silly faces you do in the mirror, the lame jokes you tell your loved ones, the little funky celebration dance step in your home. WHEN are YOU most YOU? Now hold that thought… that YOU… NOW BRING IT!

“…into everything you do”

We all have the same amount of hours in a day and we all have many things to do. Work, Learn, Contribute, Family, Exercise, Eat, drink good Wine, Rest, Pray, Play, Party, Kiss and Make out and more… Is work the most important? Is family the most important?

That’s where I think most of us get tripped up. We separate our lives into these mutually exclusive bubbles and we try to balance work and life. We have these separate personas, with separate efforts, with different degree of who we truly are, we then try to play this tiring balancing game and we hate life.

Put everything you are into everything you do

Here is the good news buddy! There is only one YOU. There is only one NOW. There is only one HERE. So BRING that ONE YOU to the NOW, to the HERE! Put ALLLLLLL that YOUness of YOU into EVERY EVERY EVERY NOW HERE THING you do.

If you think like that, you will be like that and you will be you always always love every single second of life.

A-Lin- 有一種悲傷 A Kind of Sorrow

我不羨慕 太陽
Wǒ bù xiànmù tàiyáng
照不亮你 過往
zhào bù liàng nǐ guòwǎng
有些黑暗 我們 都一樣
yǒuxiē hēi’àn wǒmen dōu yīyàng

我太嫉妒 時光
wǒ tài jídù shíguāng
能離開的 大方
néng líkāi de dàfāng
不用開口 也就無需躲藏
bùyòng kāikǒu yě jiù wúxū duǒcáng

有一種悲傷
yǒu yīzhǒng bēishāng
是你的名字停留在我的過往
shì nǐ de míngzì tíngliú zài wǒ de guòwǎng
陪伴我呼吸 決定我微笑模樣
péibàn wǒ hūxī juédìng wǒ wéixiào múyàng
無法遺忘
wúfǎ yíwàng

有一種悲傷
yǒu yīzhǒng bēishāng
是笑著與你分開 思念卻背對背張望
shì xiàozhe yǔ nǐ fēnkāi sīniàn què bèiduìbèi zhāngwàng
剩下倔強 剩下合照一張
shèng xià juéjiàng shèng xià hézhào yī zhāng

成為彼此的路 多嚮往 怎會失去方向
chéngwéi bǐcǐ de lù duō xiàngwǎng zěn huì shīqù fāngxiàng
有一種悲傷Oh
yǒu yīzhǒng bēishāng Oh
留在我過往 無法遺忘Oh
liú zài wǒ guòwǎng wúfǎ yíwàng Oh

有一種悲傷
yǒu yīzhǒng bēishāng
是你義無反顧 讓愛成為 我身上的光
shì nǐ yìwúfǎngù ràng ài chéngwéi wǒ shēnshang de guāng
給我溫暖 卻不准我遺忘
gěi wǒ wēnnuǎn què bù zhǔn wǒ yíwàng

有一種悲傷
yǒu yīzhǒng bēishāng
不想要與你分開 思念才背對背張望
bùxiǎng yào yǔ nǐ fēnkāi sīniàn cái bèiduìbèi zhāngwàng
你是所有 你是合照一張
nǐ shì suǒyǒu nǐ shì hézhào yī zhāng


English Meaning

i don’t envy the sun
it can’t light up your past
there’s some darkness
we are all the same

i’m jealous of time
that can leave moments so easily
it doesn’t need to say anything
it doesn’t need to hide

there’s a kind of sadness
which is your name stuck in my past
it accompanies my breath
and it determines the way I smile
unable to forget

there’s a kind of sadness
which is smiling while leaving you,
but thoughts of missing you is back facing you
what remains is a photo together

becoming each others path, but losing the direction
there’s a kind of sadness
that stays with my past
unable to forget

there’s a kind of sadness
which is you unconditionally let love become the light in me
giving me warmth but not letting me forget

there’s a kind of sadness
not wanting to be apart from you
but but the memories continue to linger
you are just a photo of us together